A Conclusion of Sorts, and Oprah

My yoga friends, the summer has officially come to an end. Well, maybe not officially- I haven’t checked with the farmers’ almanac or the elite group of calendar creators who have the power to declare things like summer has officially ended or let’s have the groundhog decide! But my full-time yoga adventure has (sadly) come to a close.

I write to you from my spectacular penthouse of a college dorm room, where we have air conditioning, enormous windows, and enough space for a futon plus three beds. (My bed is bunked so high I might actually be in space, but the ever-present possibility of falling to my death just makes things that much more exciting.) And being back at school is no excuse to stop practicing yoga!

There’s a Vinyasa studio down the street that I dragged Julie to tonight, and we both bought 3-month unlimited memberships. It isn’t sweaty, we use props, and the instructors don’t tell us our foreheads should be touching our toes, but we’re finding a way to love it all the same.

All in all, this summer has been a most magical adventure: challenging, eye-opening, sweaty. If you get the chance, check out the tab above that says A Grand Yoga Adventure; it’s my final piece for the project and I would just love if you took a gander.

This is where I’m tempted to get cheesy and say I learned a lot about myself, the world is good at its core, you can do anything if you put your mind to it, and other cliche things that are best left on posters in elementary school classrooms. But I’ll just leave you readers with a heartfelt thank you. (I do it all for the fans. Taylor Swift and I are similar that way.)

To avoid boring you with an average corny conclusion, I would like you to imagine that I’m a celebrity on a well-viewed talk show; maybe Ellen, or one of those happy Oprah episodes. (I don’t care that she’s not on the air anymore, O is still the queen of daytime TV.) So I’m discussing my project, and Oprah asks me enthusiastic questions about the sweat, the obstacles, the marvelous blog posts. The studio audience (populated mostly by women ages 35-65) is groaning miserably at the mention of the whole thing being over. Oprah shows a delightful little photo montage of me being sweaty in a variety of places, and viewers across the country are smiling and chuckling and saying to each other I’d really like to meet that yoga blogger girl, she’s just so cool/witty/stunning. And then Oprah asks the question everyone’s been waiting for.

O: So Hannah, tell me. What’s next? Where do you go after this wild yoga blogging success?

(The studio audience falls silent, collectively fidgeting with anticipation.)

H: Well, the project really helped me grow as a person, and I’m just so thankful to have been given such a wonderful opportunity. (Dramatic pause.) But, I’m not sure I’m ready to give up this whole blogging thing just yet.

(The studio audience releases one giant strangled cheer, giant because they know what’s coming next, strangled because Oprah has held up her hands for them to quiet down so she can ask me her next question.)

O: Hannah, does… does this mean you’re going to keep blogging?

H: Yes, I am going to keep blogging.

(The studio audience erupts into wild applause so the viewers at home can barely hear what I said past yes, but no one cares, people across the country are laughing, jumping from their couches, exchanging hugs and friendly slaps on the back. It’s like the Americans just won gold in Miracle.)

So yes, my friends, the news is true- I plan to keep blogging. Possibly about college, possibly about other things. I’ve seriously considered devoting an entire website to elephant puns. But no matter the topic, I’ve decided to continue this adventure- sharing my thoughts and my writing with you, you lucky sons of bitches.

(Thunderous applause from the studio audience, despite the few mothers who exchange offended  looks like did she really just say sons of bitches?)

Same time, same place, next week I’ll be posting a link to my new blog. Come check it out if you want, or don’t. (But yes please do, and if you like it send it to your friend/dad/grandmother/cat. That’d be really awesome.)


Shameless Self-Promotion (and some animals)

When asked what he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied, “I wish no gifts, only presence.” -website with a lot of yoga puns

This week, I have something a little different for you guys. As you may already know, I’ve been blogging and researching and yoga-ing all summer, all in the name of bettering my writing skills (and the flexibility of my knee ligaments). In addition to the blog posts you may have already read (or not have read, in which case please scroll down and enjoy), I’ve also written an extended piece on my Bikram 30-day challenge. This piece is exclusively available to you readers, all twelve of you, under the tab above labeled A Grand Yoga Adventure. Please peruse the piece at your leisure, and don’t hesitate to let me know what you think!

As promised last week, I’d also like to share some of my more serious Internet research findings. Behold, animals doing yoga:

down dog


This one is rather irrelephant, wouldn’t you say?

Longleat Safari Park, Britain - Sep 2006


Downward facing… cat






The Post-Vacation Post

Hello my yoga friends!

I have just returned from a family vacation filled with sunny bliss and raunchy movies. (If you have the chance to see We’re the Millers with your family and you’re abnormally comfortable with your parents, I promise it’s a good time.)

And of course we found some yoga along the way.


My dad also came with my mom and me to this Bikram practice, though he opted to be the photographer rather than the photographed after an especially torturous 90 minutes in the hot room. Maybe it was the studio’s slippery wooden floors, maybe it was the instructor’s strangely shaped beard, or maybe it was the fact that all three of us had eaten enough chocolate to kill a Dementor in our week on the beach, but this practice slapped us all pretty hard across the face. My limbs felt like bricks and my stomach cramped up halfway through the standing series. My mom ran out of water and hadn’t hydrated enough before class. My dad… well, my dad only goes to Bikram once every two months, so every class kind of slaps him across the face. But we survived the practice and dragged ourselves out of that studio with genuine gratitude for the fact that none of us threw up on the floor.

Though our single yoga adventure for the week was a little miserable, the rest of the vacation was just marvelous:

  • I ran 5 miles in 46 minutes and 45 seconds! Despite my body’s pleas I did not stop to walk once, thus reaching another one of my goals for the summer. (And a big thanks to my cousin Kristina for kicking my ass, couldn’t have done it without you.)
  •  We perused little shops that sold signs with all kinds of quotes, many of them yoga inspired.
    (I do love me some quotes.)
  •  We dabbled in high-fashion modeling.
  •  We tested the age-old adage, if your friends jumped off a bridge, would you?
    (Yes. Yes we would.)

We had to take a boat and a car to get home yesterday, and nobody killed each other in the process. So I’d call the week a success.

My mom and I went to another Bikram class this afternoon, and I am proud to report that we did not feel like we were going to die. One of our favorite instructors was teaching, we drank enough water before class, and we both wore colorful outfits that showed off our bangin’ vacation tans. We rocked it today, ladies and gentlemen.

And so the pendulum swings. Good days, bad days, sunny days, rainy days. (I actually just wrote that as a serious sentence, then realized that my subconscious is quoting Wyclef Jean. Should I be proud or embarrassed?) It just goes on my friends.

On a somewhat irrelevant note, I’ve been doing a lot of research on animal yoga lately (namely googling “animals doing yoga”) and I’d love to share my findings with you soon. Next week perhaps? Same time, same place.



Downward Facing Bog?

I’m currently on vacation with my family; between naps on the beach and tonight’s riveting finale of The Bachelorette, I’ve been hard pressed to find time to concoct a masterfully witty blog post. But before I completely fall into a chocolate/reality TV-induced coma, I’ll leave you friends with a few tidbits.

  • My cousin Kristina and I decided to go on a run together yesterday. As we set out on our jog, she turned to me and said- and this is a direct quote- “yeah, I usually run pretty slow.” I rejoiced. She then proceeded to set a pace that made me painfully aware of my own mortality, and we kept this pace for about 3 miles. (Damn you, Kristina.)
  •  To celebrate my survival of this run, I decided to do a few sun salutations in our backyard after we finished stretching. Just as I was coming out of my first downward dog, there came a surprising yell from our bedroom window on the second floor. “Look straight into the eyes of God!” Kristina shouted like she was announcing the name of a new Pope. We laughed so hard I almost peed.
  •  We just watched the sun set over the ocean.IMG_0064
  • If you haven’t seen this commercial yet, it’s pure gold. In case you can’t hear the dialogue over the cameraman’s hysterical laughter, Younger Ocean Spray Guy is doing yoga in the cranberry bog as part of his morning routine. Old And Wise Ocean Spray Guy asks Younger Guy what he calls his last pose, to which he responds, “That’s, uh, downward facing bog?” (Genius.)


Have a wonderful week, yogis and yoginis.